THE IDEA OF HAVING ROOMMATES CAN BE SCARY, BUT DON’T FRET
Many people who are in college or have at least moved out of home can probably all say that they’ve lived with someone they did not know very well. I’m sure another large fraction of these people can probably say that their roommate was maybe a bad one, or even terrible.
Whether this year is your freshman year and first year living with someone you might not know as well; or perhaps you just moved into an apartment and decided to go for random roommates, roommates can be a scary thing. Maybe you knew someone attending the same school as you and decided that they would be the perfect roommate and perfect person to live with because you already get along with each other? Either way, you can be absolutely best friends with someone but have no idea how you two are going to live together. Because of this being a good roommate or having a good roommate can be something that takes time and communication.
For me, I consider myself so lucky that the only ‘issue’ I had with my freshman year roommate was how often the trash was taken out and maybe the dishes. Other than that we were certified best friends. However, my sophomore year of college, I was stuck in some real leases with people who were great as people, but not necessarily easy to live with. The real problem with my sophomore year was from the girl who tricked me into taking over her lease when I was desperately trying to move and had me take her place with two roommates she had major beef with. I was just trying to help a girl out. These girls I ended up living with were super sweet people and we got along great, but we were absolutely nothing alike and haven’t talked since I moved out.
Nevertheless, whether you have a bad roommate or are worried you might be the bad roommate, I’m here today to give you some tips and tricks on how to be the best roommate to a stranger you possibly can.
THE TIPS
- Communicate, Communicate, Communicate
I cannot possible stress more how important it is to be able to communicate with the people you are planning on living with. You don’t need to be besties or even friends, you just need to at least have a way to talk without worrying about it blowing up.
Communication is important for little things as well as big things; for example, for little things like them being too loud while you had a big assignment to them not pulling their weight for chores. Either way, you and whoever you decide to live with need to be able to comfortably hash out any problems you might have.
- Respect the Common Area
I think this tip is the most important one to me. When it comes to living in a space where you and your roommates all have separate bedrooms but share something like a living room and a kitchen, it is important to always be sure you are cleaning up after yourself in the common area.
There is nothing worse than having to get something done in the kitchen like make dinner and coming out to see that your roommate made an explosion in the kitchen and walked away from it. Cleaning up after yourself is the number one way to keep your roommate happy with you.
My number one rule for living with other people is that your room is your room and if it’s a mess not as no one’s problem but your own, but because you share a space, you have to keep the shared space clean at least.
- Respect Each Other’s Stuff
This is something I cannot stress enough. When you move in with someone, and you both contribute items and decor to the dorm or apartment, it is important to respect the stuff they brought with even more than you treat you own.
I would say to go as far as NEVER borrow something without asking. This goes for things big like clothes and appliances to little stuff like food they bought and miscellaneous stuff. Unless you have already established what in the apartment is fair game, always air on the side of caution and ask first! They will most likely say yes and be grateful you considered asking!
- Chore Chart to Eliminate Arguments
Do you have a roommate that maybe isn’t pulling their weight when it comes to taking out the trash or mopping the floors? A chore chart may be a really great way to eliminate this argument from even starting. Having people assigned to certain chores throughout the week makes it so you’re not pulling all the weight or worried that one of your roommates has been doing all the chores by themselves without saying something.
This is also a great way to keep your roommates accountable as well as a great way to continue to learn responsibility when it comes to living away from home.
- Don’t be Afraid of that Couch Convo
Being confronted or having to confront someone you live with is something no one wants to have to do, but sometimes it’s just gonna happen. My tip would be to not be afraid to have that conversation with them. The worst that can happen is they don’t change their ways but at least you’ll know that you said something and addressed the issue.
Issues that go on unaddressed can turn into much bigger issues if you don’t try to confront them at the beginning. Not being afraid to have that conversation with your roommate ~ maybe on the couch of your guy’s cute apartment ~ is the perfect way to make sure your living environment continues to be safe and comfortable.
- Establish Boundaries
Establishing boundaries will be huge to your relationship with your roommate. Whether you want the roommate relationship where they’re in your room all the time constantly knocking and ready to hang out or you’re more of the person who wants to be friends with their roommate but also really needs their time alone, it is important to set boundaries from the beginning to keep things comfy.
This can be important when it comes to what time you wake up, what level of noise is OK, the way you feel about people coming over, and whether you like to stay in or go out.
Your dorm or apartment should be I’m comfortable space for you to come home to after a long day, and if your living situation is not comfortable it can really affect your mental health. Therefore, if you set boundaries from the very start with living with someone you can always make sure you’re respecting the other person space.
IN CONCLUSION
These tips are just some ways to be sure that you and your dorm roommate or whoever you share your apartment with can continue to be cordial with each other for the duration of your time living together. Acting on these tips and even judging your roommate based on these tips is a great way to determine whether you want to live with them next year, move in with new people, or take that leap to move into a place alone.
